Family Online Safety Contract for Your Children

Family Online Safety Contract and positive reinforcement

Are you looking to help your family develop safe online habits? Family Online Safety Contract and positive reinforcement can be a powerful tool to encourage responsible online behaviour in children. By focusing on specific, observable actions and offering appropriate rewards, you can create a positive online environment for your kids.

Want to learn more about how to put this into practice? Continue reading for a step-by-step guide to using Family Online Safety Contract and positive reinforcement effectively, including which target behaviours to focus on, what kind of rewards to use, and how to make sure your family is on the right track to safer online experiences.

Let’s Make a Super Cool Family Plan and Contract!

Hi everyone! I’m really excited because we’re going to work together to learn about being super safe online. The goal isn’t to get anyone in trouble. Instead, we’re going to help each other understand how to use the internet in a smart and safe way. We’re going to make our very own family plan and contract for online safety!

Our Goal

We’re going to focus on one thing: Creating a family online safety contract that will help us be responsible and have fun online! We’ll take it step-by-step, so it’s easy to learn and understand. Instead of trying to do everything at once, we’ll look at a few things at a time, like keeping our personal info safe, dealing with cyberbullying, and making sure we have a good balance of online and offline time.

Let’s Learn Together How to Create A Family Online Safety Contract!

It’s great that you’re thinking about creating an online safety contract for your family. Using a contract is a good way to establish clear guidelines and expectations for internet and device use, and to encourage open communication between all members of the family.

It’s also important to consider that the contract is not the only tool to use, as ongoing communication is key to your children’s safety. You also want to use positive methods of encouragement to guide their online behaviour.

How to approach it with your children:

• Start with examples: “I’ve found some examples of online safety plans from places like FOSI, SafeKids.com, and the Family Online Safety Agreement! We can look at them together and talk about what each part means.” By using examples from reputable sources, you’re providing a solid foundation for your discussion.
• Collaborative Approach: “I want to hear what you think and any ideas you might have.” It’s essential to involve your children in the process, as they are more likely to adhere to the rules if they have helped to create them. Collaboration promotes a sense of ownership and responsibility12.
• Encourage Questions: If your child asks a question, you could say, “That’s a great question! It shows you’re thinking hard about online safety,” or “I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts; it’s helpful for everyone to hear.” Positive feedback encourages participation and critical thinking.

• Recognise Good Ideas: “And if you have a great idea for our family contract, I’ll be sure to tell you it’s fantastic.” Positive feedback and praise will encourage them to engage constructively, and will foster an environment of trust.
• Key areas of focus: As you review the contracts together, be sure to emphasise certain key aspects, such as:
  • Protecting personal information: This is a fundamental rule, including not sharing names, addresses, phone numbers, or schools.
  • Being respectful online: Encourage treating others with kindness and respect, and avoiding cyberbullying.
  • Managing screen time: Discuss the importance of balancing screen time with other activities.
  • Asking permission: This includes seeking approval before downloading new apps, or sharing photos or videos.
  • Open communication: Foster an environment where they feel comfortable sharing anything that makes them feel uncomfortable online.
  • Password security: Passwords should remain private, and not be shared.
  • Avoiding meeting online contacts in person: This is also a key area for children to understand, and emphasise to not agree to meet anyone they only know online

It’s also good to think about what we can do, instead of just what we shouldn’t do. Like, instead of saying “don’t talk to strangers online,” we can say, “let’s be careful about who we talk to online, and make sure they are who they say they are”.

When we understand something new, I’ll say things like, “Great job on this draft! Let’s see what we can do to make it even better!” It’s all about learning and growing together!

Creating Our Family Plan and Family Contract

Now, let’s create our family’s online safety plan together! Everyone will have a chance to add their ideas. This will help us feel like we own the plan and want to follow it. If someone brings up a problem, we’ll work as a team to figure it out. For instance, if someone is worried about sharing their location, we’ll explore ways to solve it together. We can talk about different choices and find a solution that helps everyone feel comfortable. I’ll be sure to say something like, “I can see you put a lot of effort into understanding the security risks, that’s fantastic, if you are working hard.

Keeping it Up and Staying Awesome!

We’ll make sure to look at our family online safety plan again every so often. This will help us remember it and make changes if we need to. I want everyone to feel like they can ask questions or share their thoughts anytime, not just when we have a meeting. As a grown-up, I’ll also be sure to do my best to follow our family plan and show you how it’s done. We can celebrate our success by having a family movie night, or game night!

How Can We Be Super Safe Online?

• Keep Personal Info Private: We will not share our valuable and personal information, photos, or images with anyone that we do not know in the real world. This includes things like names, addresses, phone numbers, or our school….
• Secret Passwords: Keep your passwords a secret, except from your parents. It’s also important to not make new accounts or change passwords without asking a parent….
• Be Kind Online: Always be kind and respectful to others, just like we are in real life…. We’ll never be a cyberbully.
• Balance Screen Time: We need to balance our online time with other fun stuff like playing outside, reading books, or hanging out with family.
• Ask Before Downloading: We should always ask for permission before we download any new apps….
• Talk About Stuff: Let’s talk to each other about what we’re doing online. If something makes us feel weird or uncomfortable, let’s talk about it openly….
• Never Meet Up: If we meet someone new online, we should never meet them in person without a grown-up’s permission and help.
• Permission for Photos: Never share photos or videos without asking first….
• Privacy Settings: Let’s be sure to keep our accounts set to private.

Remember, the most important thing is that we are a team, learning and growing together. We are focusing on the good things we can do, not just the things we shouldn’t do. By working together, we will be super awesome and safe online!

Customisable Online Safety Contract Options

Every family is unique, so I offer different contract options to fit your needs. Here’s what’s available: Every family is unique, so I offer different contract options to fit your needs. Here’s what’s available:

• Basic Family Online Safety Contract (Free until the end of January): This is perfect for families just starting their online safety journey. Get it here.

• Basic Family Online Safety Contract with Digital Copy of “Keeping Families Safe on Social Media” (£14.99): A great entry-level option with added resources. Get it here.

• Age-Specific Bundle Family Online Safety Contracts (£20): Includes tailored agreements for younger children, pre-teens, and teens. Get it here.

• Age-Specific Bundle Family Online Safety Contracts with Digital Copy of “Keeping Families Safe on Social Media” (£24.99): Adds a valuable parenting guide to the bundle. Get it here.

• Premium Family Online Safety Contracts Pack (£35): A comprehensive package covering everything from device use to gaming, perfect for families who want detailed guidelines. Get it here.

• Premium Family Online Safety Contracts Pack with Digital Copy of “Keeping Families Safe on Social Media” (£39.99): The ultimate package for in-depth online safety. Get it here.

Each option includes a carefully crafted set of contracts to help your family navigate the online world safely, with resources tailored to your specific needs.

Free Family Online Safety Contract Template

To make things even easier, I’m offering a free downloadable family online safety contract until the end of January 2025! This customisable template includes all the essential components discussed above and can be tailored to fit your family’s unique needs. Simply download it, review it together as a family, and start your journey to safer internet use. Click here to download your free template!

Step 1: Understand the Basics of Positive Reinforcement

• Positive reinforcement involves rewarding desired behaviours to encourage their repetition1. This approach focuses on what children are doing right rather than what they are doing wrong1. This can be more effective than punishment or negative feedback.
• It’s important to focus on specific, observable behaviours rather than general statements1…. For example, instead of saying “be safe online”, focus on specific actions like “you asked for permission before downloading a new app.”
• Remember that consistency is key; the more consistently positive reinforcement is applied, the more likely the behaviour will continue.
• Patience is necessary because it can take time for behaviours to change

Step 2: Identify Target Behaviours Related to Online Safety

• Based on our previous discussion, here are some positive behaviours that we want to encourage:
  • Protecting personal information: Not sharing personal details online.
  • Using strong passwords: Keeping passwords private, except from parents.
  • Being kind online: Treating others with respect and kindness.
  • Balancing screen time: Using devices in moderation and engaging in other activities.
  • Seeking permission: Asking before downloading new apps or sharing content.
  • Open communication: Talking about online experiences and concerns.
  • Reporting inappropriate content: Speaking up about online interactions that make them feel unsafe.
  • Avoiding online meetings: Not agreeing to meet in person with online contacts.
  • Making sure online accounts are private12.
• When you create your specific list of target behaviours, include your child in the process, so they feel ownership.

Step 3: Choose Appropriate Reinforcers

• The best reinforcers are those that your child finds motivating. Some examples include:
  • Praise and verbal affirmation: “I really appreciate how you came to me to discuss this” or “That was a great decision to not give out your password”.
  • Quality time: Spending extra time together doing an enjoyable activity.
  • Privileges: Allowing extra screen time, a late bedtime, or other privileges.
  • Small rewards: Stickers, small toys, or other tangible rewards.
  • Public acknowledgement: Praising their behaviour publicly in front of family or friends.

• Remember to use age-appropriate reinforcers and consider what your child enjoys.
• Vary the rewards so that children don’t become bored with the same incentives.

Step 4: Implement Positive Reinforcement

• Be immediate1: Reinforce the behaviour as soon as you see it. For example, if your child asks for permission before downloading an app, praise them right away.
• Be specific: Clearly state what behaviour you are reinforcing. For instance, “I am proud of you for telling me about that uncomfortable message you received.”
• Be consistent: Reinforce the desired behaviours every time you see them.
• Be genuine: Make sure your praise is sincere and reflects your true feelings.
• Start simple: Start with just a few target behaviours and then add more as your child becomes more proficient.
• Focus on effort: Reinforce not just successful outcomes, but the effort children put into making good decisions.

Step 5: Monitor Progress and Adjust

• Keep track of which behaviours are being reinforced and which reinforcers are most effective.
• Regularly communicate with your child about their progress. Use the conversations as another opportunity to reinforce the importance of safe online habits.
• Adjust the strategy as needed. For example, if a particular reward is no longer motivating, switch to another type of reinforcement.
• Celebrate successes to reinforce good behaviours and motivate your child to continue to make good choices.

Step 6: Model Responsible Online Behaviour

• As a parent, be a positive role model. Demonstrate the online behaviours that you are trying to teach your child. If you ask your child to put their device away during family time, be sure to do the same.
• Show your children how to use technology safely, responsibly and respectfully.
• Be open about your own challenges and mistakes online and show your child how you handled them.

Step 7: Maintain Ongoing Dialogue

• Positive reinforcement is most effective when paired with ongoing communication about online safety.
• Make it a habit to ask your child about their online activities, not in a way that implies suspicion, but out of genuine interest.
• Create a safe and supportive environment where your child feels comfortable talking about their online experiences without fear of judgment

By following these steps, you can use positive reinforcement to effectively promote safe online behaviour in a supportive and positive environment. Remember that the goal is to empower children to make safe and responsible choices independently, and this requires consistent effort, patience, and understanding from parents and caregivers.

Key Principles of Positive Reinforcement in this Training

• Focus on strengths: Recognize what everyone does well and build on those strengths.
• Be specific with feedback: Avoid generic comments like “good job.” Instead, say things like “I appreciate how you thought about your digital footprint when choosing your username”.
• Use encouragement: Provide consistent support and encouragement throughout the training.
• Be patient and understanding: Learning new concepts can take time. Be patient with yourself and others.

By using positive reinforcement in this way, you can create a supportive learning environment that enhances understanding and ensures everyone feels confident in navigating the digital world safely and responsibly.

Here are some key topics that you might want to include in your family online safety contract, as mentioned in the sources:

• Personal Information: Not sharing personal information like names, addresses, phone numbers, or school names online.
• Passwords: Keeping passwords private, except from parents. Not opening new accounts or changing passwords without permission.
• Online Interactions: Being kind and respectful to others online and not engaging in cyberbullying.
• Screen Time: Balancing screen time with other activities, like playing outside, reading, or spending time with family.
• Downloading Apps: Asking for permission before downloading new apps.
• Talking About Online Experiences: Sharing with each other what you are doing online and talking about anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
• Meeting Online Contacts: Not meeting anyone in person that you have only met online without a parent’s permission or supervision.
• Sharing Photos and Videos: Not sharing photos or videos without permission.
• Privacy Settings: Ensuring accounts are set to private.

This approach emphasizes creating a safe and open environment for discussions about online safety, using positive reinforcement to encourage participation and understanding.

What is a family online safety contract?

A family online safety contract is an agreement between family members, especially parents and children, that outlines the rules and expectations for using the internet and digital devices safely and responsibly.. It’s a way to have a collaborative discussion and create a set of guidelines that everyone agrees to follow3….

Why is it important?

• It helps families have open conversations about online safety.
• It establishes clear boundaries and rules for internet and device use.
• It makes kids accountable for their online actions and promotes responsible online behaviour.
• It helps keep children safe from potential online dangers, such as cyberbullying or sharing personal information.
• It encourages a balance between screen time and other activities.
• It can provide a framework for families to discuss and address online safety concerns together

What are some key topics that an online safety contract should cover?

• Protecting personal information: Not sharing names, addresses, phone numbers, school information, photos, or videos with people they don’t know in the real world.
• Password safety: Keeping passwords private, except from parents, and not creating new accounts or changing passwords without permission.
• Being kind and respectful: Treating others online the way they want to be treated, avoiding hurtful language, and not cyberbullying.
• Balancing screen time: Setting time limits for device use and ensuring a balance with other activities.
• Asking for permission: Always seeking permission before downloading new apps.
• Talking about online experiences: Encouraging open communication about what they are doing online and any concerns they have.
• Avoiding in-person meetings: Never agreeing to meet someone in person that they have only met online.
• Privacy Settings: Making sure accounts are set to private.
• Reporting: Setting expectations about reporting inappropriate content and interactions.

How can families create their own contract?

• Collaborate: Make it a family activity, involving everyone in the discussion and decision-making process.
• Review examples: Look at existing online safety contracts for ideas and to understand what should be included.
• Customize: Adapt the contract to fit the unique needs and values of your family.
• Discuss: Talk about each point in the contract and ensure that everyone understands and agrees to the rules.
• Be positive: Emphasize what family members can do online rather than only what they shouldn’t.
• Make it tangible: Print out the contract and have everyone sign it.

How should parents and children approach the contract?

• Parents: Should get to know the services and websites their children are using, set reasonable rules for computer use3…, and be willing to discuss online safety concerns with their children. They should also lead by example in following the family plan.
• Children: Should agree to choose safe screen names, keep their passwords private, not share personal information, treat others with respect, and be honest with their parents about their online activities. They should also understand the possible risks of online interactions.

What if a family member breaks the agreement?

• It’s important to view breaches not as failures, but as opportunities to have an open conversation about what happened and how to improve.
• Use the incident as a learning experience, discussing why the agreement was broken and how to avoid similar situations in the future.

How often should families review their online safety contract?

• It’s important to review the contract regularly to ensure it remains relevant and effective. The frequency of review can be decided by the family.
• Consider reviewing it when children get new devices, start using new apps or social media, or when there are changes in their online behaviour.

What are some common mistakes families make when creating an online safety contract?

• Making it too formal or rigid instead of collaborative.
• Not involving all family members in the creation process.
• Focusing solely on the negative and not on positive online behaviour.
• Signing the contract and then forgetting about it, instead of having ongoing discussions about online safety.
• Not reviewing the contract regularly to adapt to changing needs.

What other resources are available to help families with online safety?

• Organizations like FOSI, SafeKids.com, and the NSPCC offer resources and advice on digital safety.
• Many websites provide printable family contracts and pledges.
• Online guides can offer tips on initiating conversations about online safety and helping families create effective agreements.

Is it okay to have different rules for different family members?

• Yes, the agreement may need to vary based on age and ability to understand the risks.
• It may be necessary to have different levels of restriction or supervision depending on the child’s maturity level and the types of devices they use.

How can parents help their children understand the importance of online safety?

• Be open and honest about the risks of online interactions.
• Emphasize that the goal is to keep them safe, not to control them.
• Lead by example by following the family’s online safety plan.
• Encourage open communication and create a safe space for children to talk about their online experiences.

These questions and answers should help you understand family online safety contracts, how to create them, and how to use them to keep your family safe online.